Eternal Family

At the temple during a sealing ceremony, I was reminded of the importance of the temple and of the eternal family. I thought about my own family and then all those whom I serve.

There is a less active girl in my ward. I have heard that her mom has contacted bishop to help her come back to church. All of you are probably born under the covenant, sealed in the temple, or will have an eternal family one way or another. How would you feel if you would not have this eternal family? How would you feel when you knew that a member of your family is not keeping the covenant? You would do anything you can to bring that person back into the gospel because you love that person. Therefore, I felt the love of God for this girl, I felt the love of her mother for her. I would not want anyone to find an empty seat when their family gather at the last day. As it would be tragic for you, it would be as tragic for anyone.

My entire soul was burning with this love of God and I want everyone to feel it also. When you are filled with the love of God, you would see others differently and would want them to succeed. You want them to be with their family forever. You would treat them as you would treat your parents, children, and other family members.

Posted by Q K 0 comments

Read More

Writing Songs... Being Open...

I love music. I love to sing. Growing up, I listened to lots of music because I was always drawn to music. When I got older, I started to sing songs that I made up. Because I am not a prodigy when it comes to music, I was never able to write what I sang down; however, I always enjoyed just making my own songs. Songs about my life. Songs about love. Songs about being sad. Songs about everything. I felt as if I could express myself completely.

Since I started playing guitar more often, I started to get familiar with chords I play and I was able to make up notes that go with those chords. Now, I can sing whatever I want as I play guitar.

I don't consider myself a good writer but I do it because I enjoy it. I feel like I can fully express myself, even things that I would never consider telling others. You see, I have a very hard time expressing myself to others because 1. I am afraid to be judged and 2. I don't know how to convey what I am feeling or thinking with words. It takes me a long time to think about what I am thinking and feeling before I make sense. It's better for me to write things down rather than blurt them out. Even when I was trying to tell a girl why I liked her, it didn't make sense to me and I didn't feel like I got everything out of my chest.

You know, I know some of my friends would read a lot of things I write but it doesn't bother me to write anything but it's so hard for me to say it. Perhaps, it's because I actually think about what I write before I write. I have written many things that I have never told anyone about on this blog such as depression and suicidal thoughts. It's very therapeutic for me to be open. 

So I want to tell you one thing about me that I've been wanting to tell the girl I told you about above. I don't know when I will ever have an opportunity to do it but I want to let it out. She told me before that she has struggled growing up because many kids have made fun of her; therefore, she had low self-esteem. I wanted to tell her that I always had (and still kind of do) low self-esteem. I never had a lot of friends. I had a few that I hung out with but never was a social butterfly. I never had a girl who was interested in me. Then I started wearing glasses when I was in the fifth grade. I was never made fun of for having glasses; however, it only brought my self-esteem down even more. I always thought that I was ugly. I have never ever gotten chocolate on Valentine's Day. I became more awkward around girls. I was never able to express how I really felt.

I guess that's all I want to say for now.

Posted by Q K 0 comments

Read More