A Change of Seasons

If you live in Utah, did you notice that leaves of trees on mountains are turning red? It means that summer is over and fall/winter is approaching.

With the change of seasons, I am starting to change also. Long time ago (about a year and half ago), I posted about "pumping-up" in the morning. I started doing that again, not because I feel down or anything but to remind myself that it's all about my attitude. If I am in a positive mood, I will have a great day.

Do you want to know what I say? I say to myself, "Kyoo, you are such a good looking man! Look at you smiling! Every girl would love to see that Asian smile! You are going to have a such a great day today because you are happy! It's going to be an awesome day! You are going to have so much fun!" Obviously, it's not the same everyday but that's pretty much what I say. (I never forget to say something about girls loving me though.)

Another change I noticed in me is that I look back on my life and things that happened and be grateful for them. When I am grateful for them, I can't help but smile. Smile about how great my life is. Smile about so much gratitude I feel. Sometimes I even laugh out loud when no one is around me. I do have a great life. I have wonderful friends. I had so many opportunities to learn and grow physically, spiritually, and emotionally. And I do believe that I grew in those three aspects of my life.

I also have noticed myself thinking, "Consider the lilies of the field how they grow" to remind myself that God is the one who's leading my life and everything will happen according to His plan and His time. I just need to follow any promptings I receive.

I went for a run yesterday and when I got really tired, I walk on the path by the duck pond. I watched the water how it was moving. I watched leaves of trees dancing to the wind. I watched a leaf I picked up which turned and bent as I fidgeted with it. I want to be like that water that moves to where it's supposed to go. I want to be like one of those leaves that dance as the Lord guides them. I want to be like that leaf to humble myself to do whatever the Lord wants me to do.

One change that I am trying to avoid is getting a haircut even though I kind of do want to get a haircut. The reason for not getting a haircut is because I don't want to spend money on a haircut and I got a haircut about three weeks ago. I think I am going to grow my hair out a little bit longer (maybe another month) then get a haircut.

What changes do you see in your life?

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I Am Famous

Y'all need to check out kyoo.com and kyoo.org because they are just awesome.

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Writing

I love writing. I love writing in my journal. I love writing letters.

Recently, I wrote some letters to someone dear to me. They weren't exactly uplifting but I took my time thinking about how I felt and just wrote whatever came to my mind. I thought about good time and bad times and wrote about them in my letters. I wrote how I felt and what I thought during those moments. I felt somber and peaceful at the same time. Writing everything without anything left for me to keep was very relieving. It felt like everything I bottled up just dissipated. I feel like everything will be all right.

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Languages of Love

I always thought this was interesting because I am curious about what I do when I care for someone/what I would expect from someone who cares about me. Now I did take the test and this was the result:

5 Words of affirmation

8 Quality time

4 Receiving gifts

3 Acts of service

10 Physical touch

12 is the highest score you can get. I am not really surprised by the result but then I start thinking about what I do for people. I think that the result is what I expect from people who care about me. When I care about someone, I try to serve them or give them gifts. Obviously, I like spending time with them (I seldom initiate hugs because I don't know if they would think it's weird or not), but I feel like by giving physical service or gifts, they know for sure that I care about them.

If you want to find out your love language(s), go to this website. That page is for singles so if you are married or are in a serious relationship, you might want to use different assessments.

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Worries And Fears

All of us worry about what's going to happen in the future. I think there is a fine line between worrying about the future and looking forward to the future. When you start worrying about the future, you start to feel anxious, are afraid, and are confused on what you should do today. I felt like that this morning, but the Lord has been very generous with me enough to direct me to this scripture:

"Therefore, take ye no thought for the morrow, for what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink, or wherewithal ye shall be clothed.
"For, consider the lilies of the field, how they grow, they toil not, neither do they spin; and the kingdoms of the world, in all their glory, are not arrayed like one of these.
"For your Father, who is in heaven, knoweth that you have need of all these things.
"Therefore, let the morrow take thought for the things of itself.
"Neither take ye thought beforehand what ye shall say; but treasure up in your minds continually the words of life, and it shall be given you in the very hour that portion that shall be meted unto every man." -Doctrine and Covenants 84:81-85-

Yes, that is a missionary scripture but it was exactly what I needed this morning. I shouldn't worry about what's going to happen or fear what might not happen, but continue to trust the Lord and take one day at a time. I love that scripture about the lilies of the field (also love the song).

I shouldn't worry about the future or fear what's going to happen because I don't know what's going to happen. All I can do is trust the Lord and just take one day at a time. I should think about how to live my life today and what I should do today rather than thinking about the future which I can't control yet. Today shapes the future. I should do my best today.

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I Never Knew

I never knew about happiness;

I didn't think dreams came true;

I couldn't believe in love,

Until I finally met you.

-By Joanna Fuchs-

I am sorry it's been ages since my last post but I haven't had much to talk about. I guess there is a big thing but it will have to wait.

I love poems. I don't understand many poems that I read but when I find poems that I like, I try to keep them somewhere. Just like the poem above. It's so simple yet so true. I especially love the part where it says, "I couldn't believe in love" because it's not that I didn't believe in love but it was hard to believe that such could exist in my life. The day will come when I will be able to tell someone, "I love you."

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Kyoo, The Proud

I didn't realize this before but I think that when I get mad at someone or something, I am just being prideful. I am not being humble enough to accept people's opinions or take a minute to think about their point of view. 

Page 126 of Preach My Gospel, there is a Christlike attribute activity you can do. Under Charity and Love, there are two questions that made me reevaluate my life: "I feel a sincere desire for the eternal welfare and happiness of other people" and "I try to understand others' feelings and see their point of view."

I told a friend before that many Koreans are very prideful. I thought I was an exception but I was wrong. I am very prideful. I stopped thinking about other people's happiness but only cared about my own feelings. I tried to do anything that could protect me from getting hurt. When things didn't work out the way I wanted, I complained about how people didn't understand how I was feeling. For that, I am very sorry. I keep messing up. I keep complaining. I keep losing hope and faith. If I truly had faith and was humble, I would never lose hope and would never complain because I would always trust the Lord and accept His will. I would try to understand others' feelings and point of view. I would want their happiness even if it would cost mine.

I need to remember that my life is not my own; it's the Lord's and His children's. I did not come here to satisfy my needs and wants but to satisfy others' needs and wants. If I truly wanted other people's happiness, I would never get mad at them but try to understand what they are seeing and feeling so that I can help them any way I can.

Life is hard. It should be.

For he who is not able to abide the law of a celestial kingdom cannot abide a celestial glory. -Doctrine and Covenants 88:23-

If we are trying to live the law of the Celestial Kingdom, life should be hard. I am so ashamed of my faults; however, I hope to improve myself so that one day I can stand before my Maker spotless.

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Leaders of the Church

Yesterday, I was able to talk to one of my former bishops, Bishop C. I told him what was going on in my life and he gave me an advice. I felt prompted to listen carefully to what he was going to say. I didn't realize then that the advice will help me spiritually. I listened to that advice and pondered on it few hours after. I realized the truthfulness of the advice and applied it into my life.

What I want to talk about is how we receive advice from leaders of the Church all the time. All of them are inspired of God, but sometimes we feel like some do not apply to us so we do not heed them. However, if we write them down for what they are, they will be of great worth to us later on in life.

After the experience I had which led me to apply Bishop C.'s advice, I decided that I need to talk to my current bishop for advice also. He has a stewardship over me and I know he can receive inspirations that can help me.

"Invite others to come unto Christ by helping them receive the restored gospel through faith in Jesus Christ and His Atonement, repentance, baptism, receiving the gift of the Holy Ghost and enduring to the end."

That is exactly what they do: they invite us. I am so grateful for wonderful examples of leaders in my life. They always inspire me to be a better person and help me get closer to my Father in Heaven and my Savior.

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Lemon Poppy Seed Muffins

Mixing sugar and lemon zest

About to make the dough

Making the frosting with lemon juice and powder sugar

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Done!

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Christ Is The Reason

Before I start, I just want to tell you something funny. I've been citing scriptures and putting links so much that I figured out how I can highlight the verse I need and send you straight to that verse. I know, that's kind of nerdy but it's just too easy to figure out.

"Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not." -Doctrine And Covenants 6:36-

I honestly don't remember the train of thought when I was looking for that verse but when I found it, I decided to analyze the meaning of it. How does looking to the Lord in every thought get rid of fear and doubt? What does it mean to "look unto [the Lord] in every thought"? The topical guide for "thought" was motivation. So we can say that a thought is a motivation or a reason to act. If Christ were our "thought," motivation, or reason to act, how would we act? We would try to align our will with His and would do everything that is righteous. We would become more Christlike because we would do what Christ would do. Wouldn't it be like asking yourself, "What would Christ do?" all the time? Perhaps, that's what it means to "look unto [Him] in every thought."

Also, when we are going through trials or temptations in our lives, we can always "look unto" Christ, who will give us peace and comfort.

"I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you." -John 14:18-

We do not have to doubt that our Father in Heaven loves us. We do not have to doubt that He would leave us alone. Just because Christ did it alone, we wouldn't have to think that we would have to do it alone. Christ did it alone so that we don't have to do it alone. We have nothing to fear because Christ is with us always. As one of the Primary songs, I Am a Child Of God explains this concept well:

Lead me, guide me, walk beside me.

What we should always remember is that, He does walk beside us but it's up to us to take His hand so that He can lead us and guide us.

What comfort and hope that sentence gives: "Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not." Do not fear or doubt but look unto Christ. Just as the sign of His birth cast out fear and doubt, Christ Himself can also do the same.

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