Before you read this, I really want you to read it as it is without any judgments because it's my thoughts and the intro to this post is straight from my journal (so you know how legit these thoughts are). Oh, also, you are going to read some really deep and honest thoughts so be prepared for that. (Don't worry, I go through this phase time to time. You will know what I am talking about.)
An excerpt from Friday, March 16, 2012.
"While I was at the library in the evening, I had this thought that it is sad to know that there are so many women who don't get a chance to be married. How lonely they must feel! How worthless they must feel! I feel lonely and worthless now so I understand a little bit of how they feel but think about how all these beautiful daughters of God would feel! how would you feel if your own daughter doesn't get asked out on dates and she feels so [depressed and] lonely? It would break [your] heart. It breaks my heart to think that daughters of God don't know their beauty and worth..."
I am not saying that all the girls don't recognize that they are daughters of God and that they are beautiful, but I am saying that at times, they do feel lonely and depressed. Of course, you can argue that your worth and beauty do not depend by the external world, but the truth is that whatever your opinion of this might be, it's still true that the external world influence how you view yourself and how you feel.
In the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, young men are frequently asked/commanded/forced to go on dates. It is true that young men learn different skills as they date, learn about themselves, and find out the types of girls they would like to get to know better. However, I believe, on top of those three reasons, that they are asked to go on dates because there are too many young women who don't get asked out on dates. I do not wish to make it sound like women are weak and can't find dates or don't have capacity to go on dates with their own way; however, the social norm constrains women from asking guys out (not that they can't but it still doesn't feel right to many people, both men and women, which I think is sad). *(One more thing: even if I only talk about one side of views, it doesn't mean that I don't believe in the other side of views.)
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I just thought this was appropriate.
They are dates if you are wondering. |
Why do general authorities keep telling young men to go on dates? I believe that they do so because they understand that there are so many young women who don't get to go on dates, because they understand that young women feel so worthless and sad that guys are not interested in them (or they think guys are not interested in them), and because they feel God's love for them.
If you, (young) men, still don't understand this or this doesn't seem to have any impact on you, imagine your sister (if you don't have a sister, imagine your future daughter) coming home with a sad countenance. She tells you how worthless she feels because she never gets asked out on dates and that guys are not interested in her. She starts to have low self-esteem and is dissatisfied with her body image. What would you tell her? You would comfort her and encourage her. You would be sad to see her like this. It's not about money. It's not about time. It's not about you (all the time).
It obviously took me a very, very long time to realize this but I hope not all of you would have to.
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True Thoughts Part 3
True Thoughts Part 4
