O Remember Remember

President Spencer W. Kimball stated that perhaps the most important word is "remember."

Do you write in your journal? Do you take pictures? Do you record it on your camera?

When I started writing in my journal, I didn't start to remember what was happening around me but to let out my feelings out open. I felt so smothered by everything going on and I needed a way to express my feelings without stressing others out. I never really had, what you call, "best friends;" someone who would listen to you no matter what, who you can always trust, who is always there for you and comfort you, who always reminds you of your good qualities, and who always tells you that everything is OK. Don't get me wrong. I had great friends whom I had tons of fun with, but I just never had someone who would listen to everything I have to say. I guess it's my fault though because I was not willing to express my feelings to people. Maybe it's social thing: men are supposed to be strong and are not supposed to show emotions. Perhaps, culture. Or perhaps, it's just me.
Anyways, my journals have been my "best friends" ever since. They know my feelings, thoughts, secrets, complaints, doubts, beliefs, girls I loved was attracted to, and so on. The most important thing they remember is my mission. I have written everyday of my mission. I didn't miss a single day since I entered the MTC. I knew that the mission would be a very important chapter of my life and I didn't want to miss anything. I wanted to remember everything. I learned to write important events in my journal throughout my mission along with my feelings. I look back and read my mission journals time to time and I remember the days that were hot, the days when it rained, the days of baptisms, the days of failures, the days of laughter, the days of tears, the days of pure joy... I remember them.

I have taken plenty of pictures on my mission. I didn't start taking a whole lot until I was with Elder Joshua Loveless. He would always take his cameras out to take pictures of members, graffiti, flowers, sunsets, etc. Ever since then, I tried to take more pictures so that I don't just have words to remember them by but pictures. Sometimes I wish I could just take mental pictures of everything. I don't want to forget the beauty around me, people around me. They are too precious to forget.
I was lying down (I had to look this up to make sure I understood the difference between "laying" and "lying.") down on grass by my apartment and was trying to read "The Miracle of Forgiveness" but it wasn't going too great since I was just amazed by the beauty of God's creations. As the sun was going down, its orange light hit some clouds which created the beauty of nature. It wasn't dark yet  You could see clouds turning orange and to contrast that, the shadow of the sunset covered other parts of the clouds. My best part was the sunlight shining through the gaps between the clouds making rays of light. I was lying there thinking that I should go up to my apartment and get my camera, but I didn't. I just didn't want to leave what I was seeing. I didn't want it to go away while I was gone. Now I think about it, I think the beauty of nature is everything surrounding what you call "beauty." I like really seeing it rather than looking at a picture of it because I can see the surrounding of what I am looking at. The sunset with clouds was complimented by buildings, trees, mountains, and cars. Man-made objects show the true beauty of God-made objects.

Pictures are a good way to remember the moment; however, video recordings are the best way to remember sounds, movements, and everything you see. I have recorded various of things on my mission: my companion having a balloon fight with a 7-year-old boy, missionaries singing, skits we did at a convalescent home, and people I met. Watching videos help me remember exactly what people said and what they sounded like. Things that pictures can't show you. Things that journals can't tell you. If I could record everything I experience, I could replay it over and over again and never forget anything. I wouldn't forget the moments of my happiness, of trials, of sorrow, of friendship, of love, and of anger.

I want to remember everything that affected me either positively or negatively. Maybe, that's why I like the background of my blog; it's gray like my memory but I still remember. Or maybe it's like me, I look plain with no fun but I am still complicated, but even among complexities, there's a little phone booth to make everything simple again. Remembering them will only make me strong and grow to be more perfect like Christ. He experienced them all and He became perfect physically, emotionally, spiritually. Memories are precious to me. Memories are what make me who I am.

"O remember remember..."

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